aiya

I hate drinking for a few of reasons:

1. I always puke if I take one too many drinks, by which I mean 4 standard drinks.
2. I cry and make a mess, and trouble Retard who has to sit there telling me that my legs have not been decapitated and I don't have a husband in 'Nam.
3. While I rarely get a hangover, when I do get a hangover, I feel like the whole world is literally crumbling on top of my head and into my ears.
4. Retard pities me when I am drunk. WHY PITY RETARD? WHY? I would rather be laughed with(at), like Alski does.
5. I hate waking up with the taste of fermented puke in my mouth.

BTW, i am homeless now. It's because my warden(Margie, pronounced MA-GI, which, i kid you not, actually means whore in Bangladeshi) does not want to let me move back into my room will next weekend. I am homeless!

All i need is a can of VB and i will fit right in. Kindly buy The Big Issue and support me guys. I mean, you never know, i might even be featured in one of those articles one day.

I am trying to teach Retard Malay and he is teaching me French. I think I am making good progress(eh, i like to think) with the present tense.

Aiya i drink too much apple juice liao.